When we first met I understood fully the kind of casual set up I was walking into. Three months into seeing you I started to think that maybe there was actually something more to it. You encouraged me, romanced me… and then I found out you had caught herpes from some girl you met on the beach and that you had passed it on to me. It’s no big deal I thought… I forgave you and wanted to continue seeing you… so fast forward to now and its been almost a year. Everything is all about you and your narcissistic needs. I’m your supply and I’m DONE with your gas lighting. You sucked me in, spat me out, sucked me in, spat me out. Messed with my head to the point where I doubted every thought I had.
You tell me about your suicidal tendancies and I tried to help. I bent over backwards to help you so that you could turn around and say to me that I meant nothing to you. And then I realised that I could never be the one to save you, I could never be the one to make you happy, I’ll never be that girl. I loved you and you have destroyed my perfectly healthy and clean body, you have destroyed my self confidence and this is going to be a long road to recovery. I really hope that you find peace and happiness and that the noise in your head quietens. I hope that you have these things so that you can love and be loved. I will always care about you but I won’t let you in again because I’m much better off without you.