The reappearing man

The reappearing man

The reappearing man

Dear W.W.

Why do you return after so many weeks of no contact? After telling me after you moved away that you would never miss me or never think of me again…Three thousand miles and six weeks later you reach out and I know you still have feelings for me.

I wish there were certain words I could find to make you come home. I rack my brain for just the write phrases, but nothing comes to mind…except…that I love you. I love you for reasons unknown. I love you for moments in the past. I love you for memories yet to be made. Sometimes I sit here and I feel so lost because I have all this love to give to you and it sits stagnant. How can this type of emotion and feeling be left to the wayside and not shared with you? I know I deserve a man in my life who reciprocates all these feelings, but moving on is just not easy for me.

If you would ask me I would book a flight to where you are and run through the airport like in the movies and find you. I would hug you so tightly and tell you all I have to say. Like, how I want to be there for you. I want to show you what unconditional love is like. I want you to finally meet my children and my family. I want to start a life with you and prove to you that although your Mother never truly loved you as you should have been…that I DO!

Now, the rain is falling outside and my heart is doing the familiar dance of longing for you. I tell myself to move on, that is the sane side of me. The uncertain side is waiting for you to wake up and come back to me.

I wont chase you. I wont contact you. I WILL love you until the very end of time and I WILL never forget the face of the man who stole my heart forever.

Kisses,

J

 

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