I’m doing this to stop you

I’m doing this to stop you

I’m doing this to stop you

A,

You waited two years to develop feelings about this? Really? ANY feelings, and it took over two years, one of which I had been blissfully enjoying denying your entire existence. What is it with you? I remember (vaguely) how you prided yourself on your traits, your potential. Potential. Potential turns into failure when you do nothing to help it as you so apathetically did.

So why have you returned from pits of Tartaros? Did you not get enough of suffering and torment within the pit with your name on it? Have you finally, finally, FINALLY to return and share some sort of feeling..? Well it’s too late. I don’t want it. And I’m pissed that you insult my intelligence by assuming that I do.

I spent the better part of two years in moronic and paradoxically hopeful hopelessness until the moment I realised you yourself had been fueling my agony for your own personal enjoyment. That was the day I decided to cut your cancer from my life. While my heart doesn’t care, yours never did.

I have finally realised it is not my responsibility to save you from your psychopathy.

There are many things I could have said about our past, but the truth is, we have none.

I had one, built up in my head. Thankfully that porcelain dream came crashing down. Please do not concern yourself with my life. This is all I will say.

I genuinely have not thought about you in a year. I have moved on. For once, I am finally happy. I’m in the process of receiving a world-class education, am surrounded by family and interesting people who care about me and yes, my views of the world have been opened up by someone who desires me. We are two halves of one whole, and our personalities complete each other. We have faults but work excellently as a team, because we communicate. Being pass-aggressive and sulking is not communication. You should try taking initiative for once in your life, it’s truly amazing when two people understand each other. In my situation, we see home in our eyes and remember what it was like to be 11 and smitten.

I have written simply because you intruded on my life and it is unappreciated. You don’t respect me – you’ve proven that years ago. Why you continue to advertise this fact just baffles me. What personal gain do you achieve from this? Is it sexual? Is it because of your emotional and sexual impotency that you feel betrayed by my no longer caring? Will you ever be as happy as I am without you? Is it gratifying for you to humiliate me in your own mind? Or is it lonely?

I tried. Please accept this the way I accepted you.

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