The Promise of Change

The Promise of Change

The Promise of Change

To the love of my life,

I don’t know about you but for me this is the hardest thing ever.
I have made terrible, terrible mistakes in the past. This mistake however has been my worst.
I am forever sorry for any time I made you cry, any time I made you feel down, for any decision you made that I thought was bad.
I never ever wanted this to happen.


We have been through a lot of stuff together, through the hardest part of our lives, like when we lived in separate countries.
That was hard.
Seeing one another for 10 minutes a day on Skype and just waiting for the day to be with one another again. To hold you in my arms and to look into each other’s eyes and for me to say .. “I love you”.
I think what got me was the fact that it was happening again. I should not have taken that out on you.
Your decision was for your health and I should have been more respectful in that way instead of being so selfish.
I can see now that I have been reacting badly with my friends, with my family and sadly.. You ☹

I think the nearly loosing the job at Apple, the fact that I hated working for Brother , the thought of having no family around me, the fact that we did not have a lot of money, I believe all of this played a big part in my depressed state.
This should not have affected what we had though.
I can see that I was wrong. I was blind.

I pray that you are still reading this… please ….

I know you don’t want to talk to me and it hurts me so bad baby.
I spend every night cuddling with the picture of you and me. I cry myself to sleep every night because I feel like a piece of me has gone.
You are my everything. I cannot live without you in my life.

Just think about all the fun times that we have had
Like the first time you fed me snails.
Playing basketball in the arcade and you beat me.
The stupid things we did at “kitchen time”.
A nice cup of tea whilst watching a scary film together in bed.
When I get you in the neck with “I see trees of green” song.
The week we spent at your mums when we looked after the plants.
The smile you had when you came off the plane and seen me for the first time in a while.
The times we spent walking around Barcelona just randomly looking in shops and trying silly hats on and stuff.
The time we went on the scooters together and you got really good.
Walking to the ocean along the sand after eating an amazing meal on the beach.
Going cinema and eating M&M’s with your sexy 3d glasses on.
Window-shopping for sofas, talking about how we want the house when we get it.
The day we got our puppy together.
The first day I told you that I love you!

They are amazing memories I have baby! I would love more with you.

Maybe you are not in love with me no more..
Maybe you do hate me…
Maybe … maybe you might like someone else

I hope not… but if so…… ☹ ….Ok…. I have to get though this horrible stage in my life and know that I can never hold the woman I love again.
To never see your smile again
To never see them eyes that use to stare in mine
To never taste your lips again
To never see you walk up the isle towards me.

But baby! Honestly think about this…

In my eyes we are right for one another. We are…
Even through this messed up situation I know we are good for one another.
Through all the stuff that we have been going through this should be nothing.
We need to be strong and fight for this love if there is anything still there that you have for me.
If you love me the way that I love you
Then we can succeed with anything.
Because I have not given up hope.
Hope keeps me fighting.
This is why I write this to you.
I promise that if we were to try again, that I would be a better man.
I vow:
That I will stand by your side,
I will be there in your times of need.
I will be forever yours and make you smile.
I will be your light to guide you through any dark places you may go.
I will be your wings if you fall
I will be a real man
The man I should have been

I miss you so much..
You are my air
You are my soul mate
And I cannot let you go.
Please think about all the things we have and still can achieve.

Relationships are hard.
But I am here and ready to be that man if you are willing to be that woman.

Nothing in this world can compare to you.
I would give up anything to touch your face once more.

I pray you think about me.
I pray you still love me.
I pray you want to try.

I will patiently wait for a response from you.
I hope it will come.

I Love you

Yours forever

Rick

 

———————————-

The Response was No.
I Seen her again today.
So I Wrote another one and sent it.

The Title of the next one on this website is called
“To Tell A Story”

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