With love…

With love…

With love…

LTME postRemember when you told me that I would never amount to anything? Remember when you told me that I wasn’t even worth living? Remember when you would scream and yell and fight with me every single day? Well those days are over; at this point we both still hate each other. It’s been a year and a half now, and I must say life has changed quite a lot. You still hate me, and your new girlfriend is so obsessed with me and my life and its so unbelievably sad. What’s even more sad is that you don’t even know me anymore. If you were to walk into a room with me in it, just by the way I walk and I talk you wouldn’t recognize me and that’s all thanks to you. When you left, it was like life changed. You lived with me for over a year and you joined in with family vacations, I gave you the world it seemed like and I guess that was my fault. Sometimes I think I gave too much, but then I realize that you took me for granted, and you know what you lost. My life fell apart that day, the day that you left without even saying goodbye … We were both in tough spots in life, you were a junior who just thought nothing or no one could touch him and I was the senior girl who thought she had her life figured out. The day you left, I found out that I had nothing what so ever figured out. What I will say is that I would never ask for life to be any differently. I’ve had people ask me if I would go back into time to change things with us and I would never. I went to a community college later that year, did I want to go there? No, I went there because you told me to go there so that way when I was in college and you were a senior in high school that we could still stay together. Boy was I so wrong in so many ways….. Being at that college made me sick because I hated it, it was that hold that you still had over me and it was sickening. The first few months I had gained weight, I formed awful habits, and I thought that life would never be the same. I was so right, but in the total complete opposite way. We ended up moving out of our house, my mom got remarried, and I applied for a college that was away from home. Being in a new environment I got back into shape like I was during soccer season and I had become a new person. I spent a year and a half single, finding myself and finding who I am, who Kaitlynn wants to be. I had so much sadness inside before I had moved on from you, but you no longer have that hold on me. I am now a sophomore at Indiana State University and I actually have my life figured out. I’m doing things for myself, to benefit ME. Im no longer under your hold anymore and I feel so bad for your new girlfriend. You used to verbally abuse me in so many ways and cuss and scream at me. It was like you hated yourself and your life so badly that you had to take it out on me. You threw things at me, and destroyed your walls in your bedrooms, and I knew that if it wasn’t your walls that you were going to hit, it would be me next. You eventually left your new girlfriend in the same way that you left me. She contacted me and told me how much she hated you, and how she now sees what I went through with you.. But then you guys got back together and you guys are so full of yourselves and its so sad. Neither one of you are in college, you dropped out lol go figure. She’s still in high school and she hates that I am so happy and she hates that I know what its like to live and lay in your bed. You guys have a house together but you’re never home. How do I know so much even though I live 70 miles away? Oh maybe because your girlfriend puts all over social media how she wishes that you were home, or how she wishes that you would actually care about her, and how shes so lonely. You guys act like you are living this wonderful life but really you guys are miserable. I’ve seen that you’ve gained weight, I swear that I’ve always hoped it was because of me and our breakup, but maybe that was wrong of me. I no longer want anything to do with you or your horrible life. You don’t deserve to have that hold on me anymore and I won’t allow it. I want you to know that I am happy and I am going places in life. I would never wish someone in a million years to go through what I had went through with you. You stripped me down, you made me feel like my life wasn’t worth living, well guess what, it is and I will never let you treat me like that ever again. I hope your life is filled with love and joy.
with love , Kaitlynn …

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