As i’m sitting here waiting for my current boyfriend to return home from work, I found myself thinking of you, but why? we broke up when we were seventeen, i’m now 20 & you’re 21, happy late birthday by the way. As the years have gone on & continue to go on I still hear things about you, no matter how hard i try to avoid it. our break up was four almost five years ago and talking about it still brings tears to my eyes & opens up wounds that we’re never meant to be open again. letting go of our relationships even worse letting go of you, the guy that i had leaned on for so many years, the guy i thought i’d some day marry & have a family with, the guy i had revolved my life around from football practices to late night study sessions was no longer going to be apart of my everyday routine, or our everyday routine because my life & my schedule was based on yours, was going to be one of the hardest things i’d have to deal with, we we’re together for three & a half years, you were my first love, my first time & many of my other first, we had some amazing times together but also some bad, our break up though was the worst & not because it was a break up, because you had been cheating on me for a year, you cheated on a girl you had wrapped around your fingers, a girl who would do anything for you.. and it hurt, it felt like someone had stabbed me in the heart & was now just turning it around over & over, but i’m not writing this to bash on you, or to tell everyone what a shitty person you are, i’m just writing to let you know i’m fine, i’m happy i’m moved on & what you did to me is just a distant memory more like a nightmare, but i’m happy & i found a guy who gives me everything i give him in return, i know you’re married i know you married that girl the one who ruined our relationship, i hope you guys are happy & you guys give what give, have a good life, but i’m done dwelling on the past i’m done letting you control my life without even being in it, this is me letting go & breaking free of the chains that have been holding me back for so many years. i’m free now.
This Is Me Letting Go + Breaking Free