Blindfold off

Blindfold off

Blindfold off

LTME-postSDP,
Its been many months of ghosting on your part. The facts surrounding that April eve are that I arrived 3 hrs early and when I called 4x you didn’t answer. You then texted that you were busy. I texted I was in town. No answer. I thought that ” busy” meant you picked up a stagehand gig. I waited till 9pm because you texted again that we were on and I should wait.. When in the parking lot at 8pm across from your place i saw your light on and a woman with you in your room, then my anxiety began. I couldn’t face you and froze but in retrospect should have rang your bell and introduced myself. I waited by the BAR ONE our meeting place till you arrived 15 minutes late. You saw my car outside and called me.
I said that two women in one evening was not going to happen. You explained you were “busy”cleaning your bathroom and Elaine a stagehand friend was crashing in your bed? Why did you lie? You said OOPs. Thats it. Together Six years? After a week prior telling me about nice Newark apartments where we could live together? After a week prior treating you to a birthday dinner, a sleep over, and the usual 5 am drive to the train because you had no car. After a week prior accompanying me to a dinner for my daughters bday and giving her a nice gift. Where was the disconnect that week later when I came in early ? Do you realize that lying to me and finding a woman with you is hurtful ? Why couldn’t I wait downstairs while your chores were completed and Elaine woke up? I am left feeling very small and that a toilet and a stagehand friend was more important than me . At least cancel the date out of respect?
I took off from work the next day to have more time with you because of our schedule challenges.?
Betrayal will be what I will remember you by. Not the vision of a woman through your window, but the negation of any wrong doing which is the betrayal of our friendship. One of the steps in the Bill W. program you failed actually says “do no harm.” Well you did. Its your call to offer the truth and or apologize. Six years? What are you made of?
And you involved your BFF to counsel me when I was out of my mind questioning should I be worrying about multiple infidelities , sending his emails with both your addresses?
When you ask a woman how her day is perhaps you will choke because with you its all about big words.
I do wish you well though since the daily pondering about your deceit and that vision of you escorting a woman out of your bedroom has quieted a little.. I crack a smile now knowing that your inconsiderate action that APRIL eve caused me to finally realize , blindfold off , that you’ve often acted on your own behalf not thinking of me at all , including times that you put your x wife first , your work, and your weed habit.

2 Comments

  1. Myles Garber 7 years ago

    Well after reading this highly charged letter and looking at the facts I feel that Hillary didn’t burn those emails and should have been elected president . Now we have a child running the country and the insanity that will cause . The best one can do now is to keep their bathroom clean and there bed made. Take Care and live your life in the future and not in the past as you have experienced that already. It is time to see why regardless of fault way many hang onto a life that has been lived and not a life worth living .
    Myles D. Garber

    • THE GHOST IN YOU 7 years ago

      The truth is that your best friend proved to be a deceitful bastard that lied and let me wander his neighborhood
      waiting for him to be free from work . He texted to meet at our designated place and knew I was in town.
      The excuse of inferred work by the busy statement this time proved to be a toilet cleaning and a woman in his bed.
      The proper, mature and kind thing to do after 6 years is to apologize even if you cant explain yourself. You are misinformed of the status of the past relationship. Steven planned the date. I arrived early and was subjected to a vision of him with a woman in his room and that cut very deep > you told me that he loved me but would never change for anyone> It is true that many hang onto a life that has been lived and cant let go easily but many also hang onto a life that spills hurt and miscommunication in an opportunistic manner with no regard for others feelings. As our president elect takes what he wants so does Steven. Showing no remorse because in reality I am only a woman who tried yet again to make time for us and excuse his addictions and immaturity. Believe me Myles, as a woman the next 4 years will surely be a challenge and I will rise up and recognize the past.. where women died from illegal abortions, were grabbed by their pussy in the workplace and put up with abusive partners out of fear . You see there is a difference between living in the past and recognizing the past. We can only do our part to band together and show our numbers as I also wish to get through to the man who held my heart that there is more to a woman and a relationship then pretending to care by asking how her day was. I live in the present not past or future and in the present I have a tatoo on my heart that needs removal. Only he can right the wrong. I have no idea what the future will bring but knowing myself and the hurt that he has caused I will grow and be stronger for this.

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