Not fair.

Not fair.

Not fair.

LTME-postI’m done being angry with you because I know it is only a mask for how heartbroken I feel. You came into my life and began throwing yourself into my future. I didn’t want a relationship. I was so apprehensive at first. But something about you seemed different. We got along well, laughed together, talked constantly, and things seemed to move at such a rapid pace, as far as feelings go. You made me feel so loved and special. Until you stopped making me feel that way. Then things began feeling off. You kept bringing up your ex and talked about all of the girls you wanted to sleep with. Although it stopped, I was still resentful of you and I didn’t feel comfortable with you anymore. I found myself deeply distrusting you. Then I discovered that you had been habitually lying to me throughout our time together. I didn’t tell you about it. At the time, it didn’t seem relevant to mention because I didn’t want to hear more lies. I just left, on impulse, knowing deep down that it would eat away at me. I was falling for you. And now, I dont even know what I fell for; complete bullshit or you. How can someone lie through their teeth consistently to someone they claimed to care about? Why did you even go after me in the first place? Why couldnt you have just left me alone? How do you sleep so effortlessly knowing that youre full of shit? Did I even mean anything to you? Or was I just some placeholder….some quasi girlfriend you could spew a bunch of crap to until the real deal came along? I hate that I ever let you come close to me. Now I can’t rinse off this distaste because I chose to hold it inside.

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