Here is something I wrote while we were together.
“Honestly, you are the most genuine guy I know. You’ve given me the privilege of being in your life. Thanks. This letter, however, is to explain something to you, I couldn’t tell you in person or even over the phone.”
“The whole situation with Alexandria (excuse me if I spelt it wrong) has been really bothering me.”
“All because I know it was my fault you had to choose.”
“I pushed you to choose and now she’s heartbroken, your mom and sisters are disappointed and you lost a really important individual in your life; but babe, I felt as though if I didn’t push you to tell her about us, when she visits, you’ll forget about me and cheat on me.”
“I felt insecure; more than I already am, I really hate the fact that to achieve my own happiness I had to crush someone else’s, but you still chose me.”
“Although I was willing to let you go because I thought she was your dream girl, you are my dream guy.”
“So whose dream gets crushed?”
“I’ve been through so much experiences, good and bad, but being through those things in life led me to this point where I know what I want, and when I want something, I keep trying till I succeed.”
“You’re the perfect example of this quality”
“I never stopped loving you; so babe, what I’m trying to say is, I’m sorry if I’ve caused you and your family hurt and disappointment because of my own selfish reasons. I hope you guys forgive me.”
“To reassure you, you’ve made a choice and I promise you , I will love you till it hurts and I won’t disappoint you, I will never make you regret your decision, because I will always be there for you and I will show you the world. I will never intentionally hurt you, I promise you, I will not make you regret what you did. You’ve already been made a first priority in my life, and I’ve decided that you are the one I love more than I need.”
“Once again, I’m sorry for putting you through this, but the way I plan to love and treat you will make it all worthwhile.”
As of, July 12th 2017,
I am still loving him as it hurts.
I am still missing him as it hurts.
I am still remembering him as it hurts.
Because “he wanted her, he needed her and I could’ve never been her”
P.s I was pretty naive for thinking it was ‘selfish’ of me to ask him to validate our relationship to a girl(his wife now)that was also Inlove with him(that he also loved) forgive me, I was just 16.
*On another note, because im hurt, doesn’t mean I’m not happy for you.
I am. Truly. Because you deserve that. All the best to you, your beautiful wife and your beloved daughter.