Nicolás,

You broke my heart by being so cool. it felt like i had electricity flowing through me whenever i was around you, whenever you sent me a message, whenever i thought about you. it’s been well over a year and i still get chills whenever i remember how you made me feel.

The moments we shared, i remember every detail so vividly. you made me feel like i was on a roller coaster. everything felt so intense. all the highs and all the lows.

I feel like we never got the chance to really get to know each other. our time was always destined to be cut short. at least, that was what i always told myself, but i realise now all that did was invalidate the feelings i so clearly had for you. looking back, it was so obvious. all the tears, snuggling against your hoodie every night, throwing your hoodie into the corner of my room whenever you didn’t reply to my messages. like ok sounds like obsession more than love but whatever.

I have nothing to say to you in real life because i can’t face you ever again. ever ever ever. it would be so embarrassing. even though being friends would have been cool. i think i might just break down though if i ever saw your gorgeous face again in person lmao. i am just finally acknowledging that i fucking loved you so much. and my heart is broken remembering all those electrifying moments you gave me. thank you for that. sorry for un-adding you on everything, not that you even care. i don’t know if i can ever ‘get over’ you. i just know you’re out there living your best life. i wish you all the best even though my heart aches a little every time i remember your existence.

-“Leo”