Things I wanted to do: 
– [ ] Bring you actual flowers, like a bouquet even though it wasn’t ever that serious
– [ ] Ask if I could kiss you on the mouth, outside of your room
– [ ] Hold your hand when we go hiking
– [ ] Going fishing together
– [ ] Take you to your first football game 
– [ ] Put a pin into your hair 
– [ ] Eat in the Chinese buffet restaurant 
– [ ] Talk to you more about my family life and insecurities and listen to yours too
– [ ] Lay on your belly or chest while you stroke my head while I cry
– [ ] Kiss your stomach and lay on it one last time 
Thank you, I never imagined myself being that stuck on you. I should’ve been more open in our limited time together. I remember the laughs we shared over our favorite shows and the commentary we whispered to each other in the movies, with your silent, exaggerated laugh. I love you, and I will always love making you laugh. I know more about myself and my sexuality now thanks to you; you were always so different from me and I love you all the more for it. I hope I get the pleasure of meeting someone similar to you in the future. 
I’m trying to move on right now but it’s difficult. My love will take a different shape, I can promise you that much. I’ll miss you so much.