dear boy who broke my heart,

this isn’t an “please come back I’m begging you!!” letter, this is all the words I should’ve said and my perspective on how all it all worked out between us.. okay, so here it went. you saw me, got interested in me, got me, started losing feelings (if you even ever had them), decided to ignore me in hopes of me letting go first, and then you left without a reason.

you know, you’d think a person would be so angry about this whole situation and would never want to speak to you again, but sadly I dont. and I think that’s what bothers me most; you knew I was completely and absolutely in love with you and you just knew I would put up with anything and everything you threw at me just because I love(d) you. I should hate you. god I should hate you.. but what I just don’t understand is how you can possibly want to hate someone so much but can’t no matter how hard you try.

I don’t know what it is with you, you’re all I can think about.. it’s like everything I do reminds me of you. when you left me it felt like my heart was physically being ripped out of my chest. and no, I’m not lying, every time someone says your name I can feel this aching pain in my body that just makes me feel like there’s a hole that can only be filled by you. why did you leave me? it was probably my stupid annoying habits that always drove you crazy but I done anyways to pester you.

Or maybe it was because I have too much while you gave none at all. I don’t know. All I know is that I miss you. i miss you with every aching part of my body and even though you’ll never know that, I’ll always love you. all i ever wanted was for you to be happy, and if you bring happy means not being with me, then so be it. I love seeing you happy, I just wish it was because of me.