Dear Church

Dear Church

Dear Church

I’m trying so hard. Each day I get a little bit better. I started going really well. 3 months after you breaking up with me and I was going pretty strong. Then, you got a new girlfriend and looking happy, setting me 100 steps backward. I tell myself, if you wanted to talk to me, you would. And you haven’t and this makes me so sad. We were the perfect couple. Everyone loved us together and we loved each other and made each other so happy. You’re over me! Why can’t I get over you!!

You were my first love, my first for everything and I just can’t get over it. I’m sorry. It’s my fault that I can’t get over this. I attached myself way too hard to you and now I am taking my anger out on you, by doing this to myself. We haven’t talked in months, you don’t even look my way when you see me and worst of all, you’re happy with a new girlfriend and moved on. Why did you break us up? You said because you didn’t want a relationship! Now you’re in one? D, this makes me so upset that you would say you love me and want to be with me forever and that our love is so strong and that you promise never to leave, but then you do. I’m a mess and you’re happy.

You get the girl, you use the girl, you leave the girl and still look like the legend. You then get the easy breakup by dumping the girl and now getting your cake and eating it too by getting another girlfriend who you are crazy over. Why. Why did this happen. Why why why why why why why why did I put my trust into you!! I was 16 years old, I am so stupid for thinking it could last. You were amazing though and I don’t know how I can find better than you 🙁 i’m trying but there is no one.

I’ve read breakup books, countless websites and nothing is working. It’s something I have to work on internally. I also hate that I have to see you everywhere. I just want you to be mine again. And you want nothing to do with me. Sex was nothing to you. You had already had sex before and it was my first time and you just took it away from me. I have only me to blame, but still. How can i get over this.. I AM TRYING SO HARD. But then one thought of you and BOOM, im back where I started. One wallpost about you, and you then are never off my mind. I hate this. I just want to be strong. I just want us back together despite the hurt you’ve caused me. WHY! When will i get over this?! 🙁 I’m trying really hard.

1 Comment

  1. Sarah 12 years ago

    Dear heartbroken,
    The situation you are going through is not easy at all. There are not easy ways out. It takes time, pain, regrets and a lot of strength.
    You have to face it, this guy does not wanna anything else with you, I know it hurts. He wasn’t the one for you. Every person we met leave something in us and take something from us, it’s always the process we cannot be the same cuz something I ourselves changes everytime. I’m bad at giving advice but I’ll tell you what worked for me: the gym, I went there every day, long hours, getting so exhausted I couldn’t think…. Eventually the memories fade away, questions without answer will always be there but they don’t seem so important after a while. Time will fly and then one day you will discover you are better and also looking awesome. Hope it helps a little.

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