To my ex-
I guess it’s fair to say you were never really mine to begin with, but I feel compelled to say that I’m sorry for everything that ever happened between us. When I first met you, it started off with an apology, and it ended bitterly with one, too. But in between those two times, you filled me with such bliss. You were absolutely, and irrevocably my best friend and I loved you unconditionally, to the moon and back, to the ends of the Earth, anyway I could’ve loved you, I did. Your hands wrapped around me made me feel like I could fly. Oh my God, where did all of this go wrong? I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for all the harsh jokes I made; you knew I was only kidding. And your laugh was the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. All the pain I’d ever felt just melted away when I heard your voice….and I was blind when I was with you. Too blind, in fact, to notice that you loved me. But now that you’re gone, I came crashing back down to reality and I shattered into more pieces that a broken window. All I have is myself to blame. I should’ve seen how wild you were about me, but now you won’t even spare a passing glance. I miss us and you were never even mine.
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I’ve been the villain and the victim myself with my own relationships. Nothing I ever do for the good of others will ever make up for my having broken hearts in the past. Maybe you were just too immature to realise what you were doing, that people’s hearts are fragile. Or maybe there was something else. I’m not going to judge. I wish I could tell you that you someday magically forgive yourself, but it’s hard work to get there, and I still feel guilt for having done wrong – and so I should. You broke someone’s heart, there’s no changing that. Use that guilt, own it, and decide to be the better person from now on. Best of luck.