Hey it’s me i need to process this for myself and for you. Before I met you i made a choice that ruined me and the way i looked at people. It wasn’t my fault what happened but it was my fault for leaving you and that’s a choice i will never get to take back, never get to see what could’ve happened. If you were my one and only or if you were just a story in my book of life but i guess i will never know.

What i did to you was messed up. I let a lie ruin what could’ve been. i let a past guy i didn’t even date dictate how this one went, even through he was gone he showed me that i could have everything. But at some point you find out the whole thing was a lie and a set up reality and i wish i didn’t do what i did, but when you hugged me and told your friends about me i felt like at some point it would be revealed that this was all a lie or this was just my mind playing tricks, so i got mad broke your heart and then counted to act like it was all your fault. Until i finally figured out it was mine but by then it was to late you moved on to another.

I hope she is pretty i hope she makes you smile i hope you both are meant for each other i hope she doesn’t rip your heart out like me and for that i will always think of the what ifs but the what ifs are all gone so i guess this letter is goodbye and i wish it wasn’t but it is and god it sucks to not have you here holding me i again let my past ruin my present