I’m still so sad

I’m still so sad

I’m still so sad

I wanted it to work out so much. I wished for those bejewelled anniversaries, and now I cry every day, thinking of you and how we love one another in the beginning, how we would never say a bad word about each other, how you would look after me and how I would look after you. How we were a team. How it all changed.

You were my constant for 10 years. I miss you not being around all the time but when you are, you drive me crazy.

You are kind and sweet one minute, but then you change into a paranoid man who hates the world and the people in it. You look so sad and it breaks my heart to see you like this.

You blame me for so many things, but I worshipped everything about you when I was 20. I would have done anything for you, and you let me down. I couldn’t get rid of the pain you caused inside my heart, and the mind games you used, to make me feel I was crazy, were completely wrong.

I’m sorry to our two beautiful children, that we couldn’t work it out, and now I pray that they will make better decisions, be stronger people and, learn from our mistakes.

Please stop being so self righteous and realise that you are far from perfect too. Please be happy again.


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