I Hate the Way You Made Me Love You

I Hate the Way You Made Me Love You

I Hate the Way You Made Me Love You

You’re a stupid, lying son of a bitch. I can’t believe I ever trusted you. Everything you said … it was all lies. I was always there for you. I wanted to be with you forever. You were my everything. I thought you felt the same. I gave up so much just to be with you. I never trusted anyone the way I trusted you. We had something rare and special. You told me that you loved me daily, and that I made you happy. Look, I know our relationship wasn’t the easiest.. but it was exactly perfect – because we were together. You knew from day one that it wouldn’t be easy, and you committed anyways. You said I was worth it, and that being together was the best thing that ever happened to you.

So here we are now. Apart. You threw it all away so you could be typical. You wanted to be “normal”; you wanted an easy relationship. You wanted the same experiences every other senior boy gets. Well guess what? You win. You get it all. You’re a stereotypical senior douche bag. You’re “normal” now. You get every single fucking thing you wanted. I’m glad you’re happy with your new life; you deserve exactly what you get. I just hope that one day you will fall in love with someone, the way I fell in love with you. I hope she gives up on you and leaves you completely broken… the same way you left me. Karma is the biggest bitch you will ever meet, and I hope she she leaves us equally ruined. It’s only fair. Since you’re such a player, the game of life should be no surprise to you.

I’m so damn lifeless right now. I made you my everything, so now I have nothing. I guess that’s my own stupid mistake. It’s all my fault, I should have never trusted you. You’re a liar, just like the rest of them. Everyone was right about you… why the fuck didn’t I listen? Because I loved you. I still love you. There’s not a second that goes by where I’m not thinking of you. The memories of us taunt me all the time.  Will I ever find something that good? Can I be happy again? When will I stop being so empty…?

Just know that you are replaceable. You’ve been replaced. I could have been with anyone, but I was with you. I wanted you; I CHOSE you despite all the odds. I could have done so much better then you… You’re just a poor, white-trash wannabe, but for some reason I fell for you. So now I have someone better (which wasn’t hard to find, might I add) but that doesn’t make things less painful. You still broke my heart. You’re still a lying son of a bitch. I’ll never be able to trust someone the way I trusted you. I can’t make that mistake again.

The truth is, I could never love him the way I loved you. No one forgets their first love, and I guess I’m no exception. But I’m moving forward from here, and I’m done looking back. This is my last letter to you. I never want to talk to you again. I never want to see you; I never want to hear your name again. Go live your poor, shitty life. It’s much better now, right? So enjoy it. Have a great time. I wish you the best (ehh.. but not really.)

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