There are so many stories i’ve been begging to tell you. So many jokes I know you’d laugh about. So many memories waiting to be made but they never will. No. You’ve shut me out. And i’m still here, sitting at the corner of my room, while people outside at the party are drinking, smoking and laughing while i’m crying here alone. All the pain you’ve caused me, though you never say sorry, I still forgive you. I’ve done nothing wrong yet you still forget about me. And as I sit there, still crying, I imagine you being happy and proud. I could see you smiling at another one of your songs that you’ve made. And when you look at her, you think about how much you love her, how beautiful she is, how she’s the most precious thing in the whole world and that she’s the one. It’s weird cause that’s what you’ve always made me feel whenever you look at me. As if you were thinking about it at the exact moment.

When I first brought you to that meadow, I remember saying that everything was so much better whenever you were there cause I’d always feel less lonely and then I named the brightest star in the sky after you. I used to look up at night, here in London, I’d see only a few stars because of the city lights and the pollution. That was after everything went wrong. I had a hard time locating you’re star to the point where I didn’t bother to look anymore. And maybe that’s what I needed. To look up, back at that meadow, stare at you into infinity, see you shining, and hope that at that exact moment, you would be looking up as well. Maybe that’s all I need. And you’ll come back to me and remember how much you loved, adored and wanted me.

But yet again, here I am, sitting at the corner of this room while people are outside, drinking, smoking and laughing. And I am still crying as I feel you slowly forgetting me with every action I make and with every second that passes. I think I should really get the fuck up now.