Years later and it still hurts. One little memory is all it takes and I’m crying myself to sleep, or picking myself up off the shower floor. I paint a good picture of course, and act like I’m doing fine. But its all a lie.
I should be happy. I married to an amazing man who dotes on me, and showers your children with love. I no longer have to stress about how I’m going to pay my bills and keep a roof over my children’s heads. I now can make sure your children have nothing but the best, even though you don’t pay child support like you should. I should be happy, but it all hurts. Every other weekend when I drop off our daughter, I can’t even look at you. I wanna scream. I want to smack you. I want to make you hurt like you hurt me.
To see you with your girlfriend, playing house, and raising a baby with her; its unfair. How dare you move on while I’m still heartbroken.
I don’t understand it. How can you just act like I never existed? I grew up with you, my adult life started with you, I became a parent with you. 8 years of memories just, gone.
I pray daily I find a way to move on from this pain. To be truly happy in my new life. Please god, help me to forget him.