Adam,
I just sat and read the old letter I found that id wrote and never sent. I forgot how much of an arsehole you were then, never mind now! I don’t expect a reply and I don’t think I’ll get one from the ignorance towards my texts.
Once again, I can’t move on in my head until I’ve told you everything that I’m thinking all the freaking time. You hurt me last time, but this time was 100x worse! You have a girlfriend and you were playing me from start to finish; yes it may have only been a few days, but it meant a bunch to me.
Let’s just start at the fact that yes, I text you first but you replied, and we spoke for hours on the phone, made provisional plans to meet up in Mansfield and looked at EXPENSIVE trains for me to come to Cornwall. You told me you were lonely in Cornwall and I was welcome any time, when in reality you had plant of company from your girlfriend. You lied to me about Facebook, about seeing a Cornish lass and about missing me. Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to have to message her and tell her? Because I thought I had you all to myself and according to Facebook, you’d been together since last year; completely erasing our relationship and calling it a mistake to her. So yeah, I’m so glad you think of me as a mistake. When I questioned you about your girlfriend your reply was ‘we’re not bf and gf before you start.’ I replied who and never heard back.
You’re an ignorant, lying piece of shit.
You went from apologising for being ignorant, to being 1000x worse than you have ever been, when you’re the one who said that ‘maybe now is the right time’. Well, that’s not true because you have a girlfriend. I really have to question whether you were ever going to tell me. I think not.
You flat out cheated on her and made me actually believe that we were going to be okay this time, I was so looking forward to seeing you. I cannot believe you picked me to mug off. All the way through last time, I felt like I was competing with Tasha, and this time I actually was. And she fucking won.
Im not lying when I say that I don’t feel any different towards you than I did and still miss the fuck out of you, I just feel angry. Extremely angry. Let’s just remember that it took me a lot to trust you, and you betrayed that and humiliated me. Once again, I felt worthless. While I was upset and pissed off over last time, you were shagging your ex!! Care much?
I waited to hear from you, figured I’d give you a day or something to chill the fuck out, little did I know that I wouldn’t because she had just drove down to Cornwall to see you and was/is there for over a week, so I was just a cheeky little shag for you when you came up north? Niceeee.
I resent the fact that you said I hadn’t changed and that I was pathetic in my replies. One I have changed which you knew because I wasn’t lying down and taking your shit; and two I was far from pathetic because everything I said was valid and legitimate. You just don’t know what it’s like to be on the other side of your sucky attitude.
I waited to hear from you, figured I’d give you a day or something to chill the fuck out, little did I know that I wouldn’t because she had just drove down to Cornwall to see you and was/is there for over a week, so I was just a cheeky little shag for you when you came up north? Niceeee.
I resent the fact that you said I hadn’t changed and that I was pathetic in my replies. One I have changed which you knew because I wasn’t lying down and taking your shit; and two I was far from pathetic because everything I said was valid and legitimate. You just don’t know what it’s like to be on the other side of your sucky attitude. You didn’t tell me shit, so no I didn’t know your sister was there. You ignored me all weekend and then had your girlfriend drive down. Did you really think I wasn’t going to be so fucking annoyed at the fact you’d of, in total, ignored me for over a week? You really haven’t fucking learnt anything.
Yeah we weren’t together, but we weren’t last time.
Yeah we hadn’t seen each other in over 6 months, but you never contacted me.
So you were right when you said ‘were not even bf and gf’ but I had a fucking right to question what the fuck was going on. You sleaze bag.
No matter if we never see each other again, you owe me a massive fucking apology. I’m so glad I found your Facebook. I was so fucking shocked and so hurt. I still am.
All that bullshit about moving up to Lincoln really shows me what kind of person you are. Yeah, you maybe moving up to Lincoln but that has nothing to do with me. You’ll be closer to Tasha and your sister. Why the fuck would you lie to me?? Why would you do any of this?
I’ve been cheated on before and I never took you for the cheating type, absolute scum.
And don’t say you weren’t flirting with me etc., because we sent nudes and had massive conversations about how we missed each other. I don’t know how you managed to convince Tasha to stay with you, but man you either have fab lying skills or she really loves you.
SO thank you, for wiping our relationship out of your mind, lying to me last year as well as this time around and using me to cheat on your girlfriend. You have done some unforgiveable shit, and yet id take you back again, in a heartbeat. But you and Tasha aren’t ever going to split, because you both agreed that you shouldn’t of last time and she obviously forgives you profusely for everything you do. You ditch me, for your ex and then come back to your other ex when you realise what you’ve lost, because you have lost a hell of a lot. On the off chance you would have treated me right, I would have been so good to you.
So, I hope one day you realise what the fuck you missed out on and that I really was the one that got away.
They say 80% of people meet the person they’re going to marry before they are 18, I really thought you could have been mine. I didn’t do this relationship just because I could, I did it because I actually saw it going somewhere, but to you I was just another fuck for you. ‘Another notch on your bedpost’.
Bearing in mind, you said to me that I was the best you’d had.
I was honestly contemplating having the implant to stop the issues from last time.
I was really looking forward to sharing a bed with you again, laughing with you again, hugging you again, and skyping you again.
But now, half of me hopes I never see you again. As for the other part, I’d love to see you again, possibly just so I could scream at you till I was blue in the face.
One last time, it would have been nice to see you one last time.