Hey !! Merry Christmas

Nope – Neither did she find me. But I dont mind dimples. HAHA. May be santa would be kind enough when he took my fairy and could replace it with a dimple waali rajkumari 🙂

Hope you are doing good. First of all, this is my secondary email i.d. I use my official one for day to day activities and I check this one hardly once a week. Didn’t meant to show ego or something by keeping you waiting. I am way over that phase.

You still got that power to keep me thinking and visit my mind at times even after a phonecall. Giggles, Laughs and sometimes I think how I could have saved quiet a few things that meant the most to me if I had a time machine. I have you coming to my thoughts once a while at some point- may be more often. The biggest struggle is when I am all by myself and trying hard to run away from distractions. When seeing things around and how people treat their counter parts I would always rate myself going back. I guess I did pretty well and I smile at myself and get to bed. Nothing magical have yet happened in my life which could take you out from my core memory.

Even when you left, and I was rolling life over, I was just sad on why people are not giving their best shot on their dreams. Some people may not have it all right now but one day they will have their puzzles fixed together as a blueprint. Just sad that why I didnt get the same effort from the other side.I met people who strugled their way ass off and beleived in each other and stood for the long term plan and …well I wasnt lucky enough.Happy that at least I tried. Also at times when a boy says dont reply back or be in touch with an another boy, he knows why he is saying . Because he understand what is his intention. Again as I said- I was a boy caught up in dreams and fantasies. I may be wrong for most of the part but quiet a few things I was right. I would also correct myself from being too lenient. I will never be that lenient ever.

I always wanted to call you and talk . But It was hard imagining you in a happy relationship and he being around you and how great your time would be with that person. I didnt wanted to keep your peace out. Did’nt knew that you were trying hard to stay afloat.

Guess what I found out about me in the end ? I would like to pour out love and take care of the one walking next to me just by expecting that they would do the same (such a big looser right ) . Plus one more thing- I am looking for a peron with whome I can share my entire emotions into. I dont have a best friend here other than Febi’s cousin sister and her husband who are far awy from my hometown. I still wish I would have gotten a best friend here or atleast I might find my future bae pretty soon. Its hard keeping all the emotions, dreams, ideas and life to oneself right ?. I still do have TRUST issues. After you bidding adeos, I promised myself not to trust in anyone and that experience is hindering me to open myself out to ANYONE in this planet. I cant trust anyone, specialy any females. I dont know why to be honest.

Me and that little boys dad are good buddies. We had a “Men’s” breakfast that day when we ended up in a mall with santa on. He had that baby when he was 20 and his wife is just one year younger than him. They are going to the same university and is a good family that I hang out with at times. I was thinking, If the same would have happened to us while we were at our bachelors how we would have taken that ?? May be would have been brave enough to face this world. Anyway would have survived.

Havent you thought wether it would have been a diferent story if both of us would have been fighters and still hanging on to the same old dreams and long terms ?. i dont know if there is 4th chance in romance as i had 3 chances already. may be in this life or the next- But I would still like to thank you for letting me experience the real romance and making me aware that I was beautifully loyal.