My love,

It is already going to be almost 2 months since we broke up. Somehow that fact stings my heart a lot purely because i thought you could never go a day without talking to me or missing me. It hurts a lot to know that you dont care about me anymore .The greatest tragedy of my life is that i loved you and had decided to spend the rest of my life with you no matter what. I was ready to face everything as long as i had you and your love but you my love gave up on me before we could even start on this journey. Why? Why did you give up on me? On us? When you were the one who always asked me to never leave you? Why did you leave me when you were the one who assured me that our relationship will never end as long as i did not want it to?
I dont understand you and maybe i never will but i was willing to love you even more because love overcomes things. I dont understand you or how your mind works but still i choose to love you each and every day of my life because love does not really need any reason and you dont have to be perfect to be loved. I love you with all your flaws and mistakes. I choose to love you for who you are. And even though you broke my heart i cannot make myself hate you because my love is true. I will always love you and care about you. You are forever in my heart my love. I cant imagine my future without you but if your happiness lies without me then i will let you go but never from my heart. I cant afford to lose you that way.
My love if only you knew how i pray for your safety and wellbeing every night. How i cry and wet my pillow just because i love and miss you so much. Just because i crave your presence and your touch like crazy. Just because your voice is all i want to hear or need to make my day but i dont get it anymore. None of it. And it kills me everyday. It kills me to know i will never get to see you or hear your voice again. Will never get to kiss you and hug you ever again.
I wonder what i did to deserve all of this? Sometimes i question God as to why he allowed all of this to happen and dont i deserve love from the one i have ever truly loved? So many questions from God and even from you but i get answers to none. It is ok i guess because not all questions have answers. All i can do is think about those sweet memories and hide them somwhere deep within my heart because i never want to lose them. That is a part of you and the only thing i have of you with me.
I will forever love you my A***
And will always hope you come back to me someday
And that someday i will be waiting with my arms wide open. Just for you to run towards me and pick me up. Kiss me and tell me how much you have missed me and how much you love me
Forever yours
Waiting
Hoping
Loving

Your love,
Aff Xena