I suppose I should have known, considering how we got together in the first place. In the beginning, I was the “other woman”, but only with respect to you saying the other woman was your gf, even though she was rarely around. When she had vanished on you for several weeks, you and I got closer. You even told me things that made me believe you were taking us seriously, and I was becoming the one you wanted. But when she showed up again, you told me all you and I were was close friends. You led me on in the beginning, so it should not have surprised me that you led me on at the end, as well. Eventually, she left, I should have taken how she was feeling as a warning. But even then I was believing you, that the problem was her. So I stayed with you.
Eight years later, that’s how we ended. You moved on before telling me you had moved on, even kept lieing to me when I pointedly asked. But I wasn’t asking the right question, I should have asked if we were still exclusive. We had been for most of those 8 years, or I believed we had. There was definitely a long period where I am sure of it, even though others would probably say I was a fool. But I knew something was not right in the last six months, and asked several times if we were ok. You kept telling me we were, and I wanted so badly to believe you, because I had come to trust you at your word. You wouldn’t acknowledge me on social media, it was as if you didn’t want anyone who didn’t already think we were a couple to see anything. Like you were ashamed.
When you finally were honest, it wasn’t as surprising as it should have been. You kept saying you didn’t plan for this new relationship to happen, but you did choose to let it. You went along with it until you figured it was secure enough, then you cut me loose. You made me an option again without giving me the courtesy to agree to it, or not. You turned me into a safety net, then tossed me away. I don’t think you grasp the magnitude of damage you did. I trusted you, now I am not sure when I will be able to trust another again. You taught me to not ignore being led on, to not accept being played ever again. You took the heart of the good woman you couldn’t even recognize that you had, and you broke it.
The damage is only temporary, I will get over it, and over you. I may say I wish you well, but I also hope someday you find yourself looking in the mirror and thinking “what have I done?” And then, you may fully grasp the hurt you caused. Maybe it will teach you something.