Dearest C,
I don’t exactly know how to start this I just know I need it out of my head. I want to start by saying honestly, I miss you. It could just be the feeling I was in or maybe it’s actually you, but reguardless I miss YOU.
We lasted for about 4 months in an undefined relationship and I knew I should’ve seen it coming. All of my friends said it wasn’t a good idea, but I followed my blind, but happy heart. We were young, we still are and I STILL miss you.
I still think, to this very minute, that if you called me, I would drop everything if you said the words “I want you back.” But I know that is foolish and I will not let myself down like that again. Even though I CAN’T help missing you.
It is now 2-3 months since we said our goodbyes & you will not leave my mind. Even though we ended on okay terms, you have blocked me on everything. Twitter, instagram, you name it. I’m blocked. I’m not even sure if you would receive a text. You won’t even look at me when we are in the same room. I’m still not sure what I did to deserve this hate from you. But I still, despite EVERYTHING, miss you.
If you ever get the chance to read this and happen to know who you are, I have a few question I need answered to move on: 1) What did I do to make it so hard to look at me. 2) Why did things end the way they did? 3) Could I have done anything at all different? 4) Will we ever be okay enough to be friends? 5) Were the feelings ever real?
That is all I will ask from you for now. If you know who I am and care about me in the smallest way, I pray that you would text me & let me know what went wrong. BECAUSE I miss you.
And C, I honestly think you were my first love, though we never said anything, my feelings were much deeper than either of us ever let out.
I wish you the best and hope you turn out the be the man that I saw in you. You are an amazing guy and some girl out there will be lucky. I wish it could’ve been me, but the stars just weren’t aligned. Thank you for all the wonderful memories. I will CONTINUE to miss you LESS & less each day as time goes on. But I will NEVER forget you and the time we spent together.
Love, L