I wish I could have told you about my pain that you didn’t see but I wanted you to see me as perfect. I didn’t want you to leave me because I was scared. I’m still broken,  so, so broken from it. Almost a half a year now. I miss the kids and the animals, I miss you but I don’t at the same time. I miss holding hands and laughing about stupid shit. I’m trying to let go but I see you with someone else and I break even more. I want to never see you again so I can stop breaking every time. However I want to see the kids again so badly. I don’t know what to do anymore. If we had never met I wouldn’t be here. Sometimes I think that would have been better…