I’m not sure I’ll ever remember writing this to you or if I will ever show you this, however, I wish you well. I don’t think you would wish me the same but since I can’t stop thinking about you, I will say whatever I have to say here, in this letter.

First, I would like to ask you “how have you been?” or “what have you been doing recently?”, although, I doubt you will answer these questions.. I tried texting you before and it sucks that I was just left on seen.. I only wanted to have a conversation with you and sure, it was messed up for me to ask you about whether I should go for your friends… Although, I asked that because I am out of my mind and I want to try doing whatever it takes to get over you.

Sadly, getting over you is hard. It’s actually extremely hard to let go whenever I see you having fun with other people while I’m here writing this stupid letter so that I can heal. It really fucking sucks, you know. Yet, I’m glad that you might be doing well without me. I hope that things go well for you and that maybe things could go well for me too. Perhaps, one day, we will get to confront each other and have a full conversation.. Hopefully, tomorrow we can really talk and be friends instead of strangers. Ultimately, I would like us to be friends and nothing else; not even a couple.. Just friends at least. I’m not sure whether you want that or if I’m the only person who wants to be friends, but I pray for it to happen because the silence between us is killing me. Then, when I see you with your other friends, having a nice talk and all, it just hurts since that is all that I would want from you.

Last week, we were communicating just fine and it really felt like we were friends; ending our relationship on good terms. Today, however, felt like the opposite where you didn’t want to even talk to me or look at me. It made me feel like I’m such an awful person to you.. Maybe in your view, I was awful and I apologize a million times for that.. Truly. I guess I’ll have to live with that, even though, please, I beg for you to just talk to me and act as if I’m your friend. Please do not treat me as a stranger or even worse than that..

I’m not sure how you feel right now and maybe you are treating me this way just to get over me, but I think to properly heal, we must confront each other about the reality. The reality being that we are no longer in a relationship.. Which is definitely sad, though, in spite of not being in a relationship, let us take time to at least built a friendship instead of pretending that one of us does not exist.

I would also like to talk about whether I should return the stuff you’ve given me.. Since they are just taking space in my room and it is quite hard to look at all of it… To be honest, I am not totally sure whether I want to keep some of the stuff to give it back to you. Oh well.. I also wonder you have already chosen someone to be with and move on with some other girl.. Though, that is not a great thing to wonder about and I would prefer it that you don’t tell me. I will say though, I hope that you never move on to someone I dislike or someone who is my friend. I will give you all the respect and space that you need as long as I am your friend and that you don’t move onto a person I dislike or a person who is my friend. I hope that you agree with that too. Anyways, maybe I will just show to you to get it off my chest. I hope I can at least get something out of you from this, but if not, then at least I tried.