Wonder why

LTME postDear D,

I don’t know what to do now. Had our breakup not been so sudden maybe I would have an easier time moving on. Whenever someone says, “He’s your ex. What happened?” I don’t have an answer. The only answer you gave me was that your feelings had changed. Honestly I’ve heard the “it’s not you, it’s me” thing but this time I think I was just a phase. When you were done, you left. You had too many other things to do. I’ve tried to convince myself that I’m over you but I can’t say I am because never in my life have I ever felt so upset about going on a date with my dream guy. The guy is easy to fall for and he’s moving around his schedule and driving all over town to meet my mom and grandparents since my grandparents and the guy live in MI and the rest of my family is in GA. I keep remembering how you told me the biggest mistake you made was dumping me over text. I remember how you said, “You deserve to be with someone, who loves you.” That hurt like hell because then I knew you didn’t love me but at the same time it proves our breakup was tragic not bitter. Maybe you remember the car crash before our first date and how you came to the hospital or how we curled up together on the couch in my basement and watch movies or how I got blisters on my feet after dancing so much during formal. If you are reading this then you know who you are. Our story was short and sweet. Sometimes I smile and sometimes I cry. Right now I cry because I can feel the butterflies in my stomach when I text Prince Charming. It feels like I’m letting go but parts of me are still holding on. You may never read this but at least I said what I couldn’t say. I go through each day acting like I am over you. I did everything you wanted to do for this to be a clean break. I know you’ve seen my snapchat about going on a date tonight. It hurts that I never check on you even when yuu have a snapchat story up but you never fail to look at my story. You can text me. You can ask me questions.

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