Regretting you

Regretting you

Regretting you

LTME-postMost of my friends expect fancy dinners, drinks, gifts, dramatic displays of affection, and trips abroad from the men they are dating.

I don’t. At all. All I would ever want from someone whom I’m seeing, is for them to walk with me down the pier next to my house. It’s my favourite place in the whole world. Before moving to London, I would walk or run down the pier every day alone. I have done so since I was in my early teens. Almost every time I do, I pass couples. I always think ‘one day, someone will walk down here with me’. That’s a big reason why I got so upset when you cancelled last minute on Brunch day. I was so excited to have a 10 year dream fulfilled, and with a man whom I was falling in love with…you.

I have lost my virginity to man who dumped me two weeks later during my first few days of classes in a foreign country…via text message. To a man who met none of my friends or family, despite constantly talking about doing so. To a man who called me unique, wonderful, gorgeous, and yet disrespectfully tossed me aside as if I am none of those things. As if I am nothing.

But, for some reason, the thing that gets me the most, is that, after waiting for 23 years for the ‘right person’, I have lost my virginity to someone who would not walk down the pier with me.

I wish I had interviewed for that internship in Brussels. I wish I had never met someone as incredible, and heartless, as you.

All the ‘magic’ you described in me is gone. You have sucked it all out from me. I am a shell of my former self.

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