I dislike you – don’t hate you Ian

I dislike you – don’t hate you Ian

I dislike you – don’t hate you Ian

LTME-postIan,

Mother always said look what happens – when you play with fire

Wonder why after all these years I still dislike you not as a human being but as Ian;
You manipulate and distaught the truth in front of people to poison their minds against me. Why?
Perhaps if you ever stopped to wonder why you would sense some insecurity on your part
For example, when we were on the phone and you asked what was I doing and I said that I was in the fish n chip shop your response was “oh you are in a restaurant hah…on a date, alright” You said this with your friends in the background in ear shot. I was 8 months pregnant carrying your child – you made me feel so alone and disrespected

Nothing changed since 2002. The other day I was in the hospital and you spoke to me on the phone when you were at your parents, you asked I could get an update from the doctors about our son…then said “oooh nah don’t be rude just ask them politely” I was baffled why you’d say something so random but after the second time when you repeated that, I remembered that’s what you do with an audience unaware of your antics. You would like people to have a bad impression of me. I think that is your insecurity and a sure sign for me to distance myself from you.

You do creep me out and I find you slimey, just cannot seem to put my finger on the reason. I think you are the least admirable ex partner and unfortunately for me I played with fire and got burnt…I had a child for you. Whilst I was at my lowest point in my life with a mother dying of cancer. You were not sympathetic, caring or protective when my mother died so I will always remember you for that. Even on the day of my mother’s funeral you were inconsiderate by driving me to your ex’s house to spy on her but I don’t hate you only dislike you. I don’t wish you well I wish nothing.

You have said that I poisoned you. I have never ever contemplated poisoning anybody in my whole life. For our son to hear you say such spiteful accusations about me is unforgivable. You are crazy for thinking I would do that and still want to live and continue to eat from me. You are a nasty piece of work.

Do you remember when I asked you for help when Callum was 6 months old , we met up in Nandos to discuss the financial situation and you said no – you can’t help. You were so bad – you preferred to buy a motor bike and so on.
Later, in life when Callum and I asked you to help towards his school fees and you said you could help but then gave me the run around then told Callum” don’t ask me for a penny “. You messed with my son’s future – I will always hold you accountable! I feel sorry for all of your children…cause you raise them all in the worst way and you do not know how to appropriately parent as yet. You repeat too many poor decisions and no matter how many presents you buy, the grinning, the laughter and small talk of insignificant words does not cut the mustard, your reasoning, maturity, respect and understanding is lagging.

Callum lost his place at the school by his third year, you had a BS excuses for not trying to help but then you had the audacity to say you are now working on getting him back in the school….isn’t that too late to decide that now? You even asked why I didn’t tell you that Callum left the school when you made it clear that you didn’t have any interest in keeping him there. Would you hate you if we both switched positions? Ian even if I will not cry or miss you if you died it doesn’t mean I hate you – I accept we were only meant to be a part. I don’t hate you, only dislike you and I don’t wish anything. I pray you get every thing you deserve in life that’s meant for you… that’s all.

Be happy and all the best. Just had those things on my mind. Now it’s published

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