To my ex,
I wish you were honest and told me why you actually decided to leave. I wish you were not such a coward to hide things and use the common excuse such as “you deserve better”. If you were the man that you claim to be, then you would work towards what you think I deserve, especially if you really loved me the way that you say that you do. I wish that you grew a pair and spoke the truth. I was left broken after loving so hard and giving you all of me. I had sleepless nights, wondering where I went wrong and how I could have changed our situation. I even tried to fix it and call on numerous occasions, putting aside my pride for love. You ignored my messages, declined my calls and left me to wonder and think that I was not good enough and worthless.
But guess what? I am not worthless and I will rise above this. I am a good woman and I have no regrets regarding our relationship. You can never utter one bad word about me because I did the best that I could to be there and you took it for granted. I would never utter a bad word about you, no matter how hurt I am .. because I am better than that. Funny thing is, when I met you.. you were so insecure and I gave you so many pieces of myself to allow you to fit your pieces together.. little did I know it would be taken away from me. You might have taken pieces of me but honey, I can always build myself back up because I am worthy of a love greater than yours.
God knows what is best for me and yes I was disappointed and I prayed every day.. wondering why God would take away the one thing that brought me unconditional happiness but then I realized something. God would never let the happiness that I lost be the only happiness that I ever experience. God takes away something to only replace it with something ten times greater! When i realized this, I got myself out of bed, looked in the mirror with admiration and started my search towards self-love. I told myself that if i was that happy before with a coward like you, Imagine how ecstatic I will be with someone who actually reciprocates my love.
You were not man enough to handle a good woman like me, you were intimidated by what I had to offer because I brought out the boy in you. I made you realize how much of growth you still need and I would love to say that I wasted my time but I am thankful because this was a lesson and I will never allow you or any other man to define my worth. Only I can define my worth.
I might not be what you wanted, but good luck finding someone who will be able to love you and go to the lengths that I went for you. Good luck trying to find a woman who will put up with your immature tendencies and reluctance to build a future due to your laziness and lack of motivation. I saw the man in you yet you were too fearful to actually become one. I wish you all of the best and no, I refuse to be revengeful or negative towards you in any form why? Because I have learned that GOD CAN DEAL WITH PEOPLE WAY BETTER THAN WE CAN.
Thank you for showing me my worth and showing me that I am better off because the man God has kept for me is worth more than the time wasted on you. Yes I feared the fire, but now i officially became it!