There is no doubt that I still think about you. I find some comfort in the thought of maybe one day you’ll be casually surfing the web, and find this letter. I wish I could see you one last time, to know what I’d feel if I had you right in front of me again. I hate to admit that haven’t been able to move on completely and happily like I deserve to. It sucks so bad because I try so hard. I’ve met new people, dated new people, cared for new people, broken new hearts and for a reason that I can’t understand, it all comes right back to you. My mind and my heart still urge to keep you, to care. I can’t erase you and its so detrimental to my existence.
I ask myself how its possible to feel so many emotions for someone all at once. Its not hate nor resentment towards you anymore, I just miss you and I am so tired of missing you. I shouldn’t and I am so tired of feeling stupid because of it. I try so hard to dislike you,to not want to know anything about you, to not see anything of you and just when I am doing well at moving on, I think I am handling myself, I fall right back down.
So tell me, is there a better way to move on? Is there a way to stop myself from thinking about you?
I have accepted that I will never find what I felt with you because you were my first real young love. So Irreplaceable.
I needed to tell you this to get it off my chest, but I will keep finding a better way to move on. I promise.
I hope you miss me too.