I’m writing this with tears in my eyes. I’m still very shocked and heartbroken by your actions. They say the first cut is the deepest and i guess it really is because I feel that even when I do move on, I’ll always be hurt by you. You were my first love, my best friend and my confidant. Before I met you i felt so alone but then I came across you and we instantly clicked. We were really close and so much in love. I never thought I would have fallen in love with you so hard. We were inseparable and no one could have come between us. We had many good times and memories with each other. It may not have been the biggest memories in the world but just us being around each other and being able to just talk and laugh was good enough for me. I really felt like the happiest girl in the world when I was around you.

I know that as time went by we started to have our arguments and I can admit that I was’t the best girlfriend in the world and messed up at times…..but which relationship never had obstacles. I was never unfaithful to you but I know I said some hurtful things at times when I was angry. I understand that everyone can deal with things for so long but the way you acted was as though I did you the worst thing in the world. You messed up too but i would have never given up on you. You broke up with me and never rally looked back, the same person you said you so loved. It hurts that you easily walked away. After being in a relationship with you for years, how was it so easy to just walk away.

But what kills me the most is everything you did after that. You told me we would take thing slow and repair our relationship, you told me you sill loved me. Then you started hanging out with a girl you said was your friend and helping her with her problems since she and her boyfriend broke up. All that time we were trying to make things work. But you just played with my feelings and lied to me because you had sex with her and got her pregnant. she now has your child and I am so devastated by this situation.

Why play with my feeling and pretend we were fixing things when all that while you clearly were into her. I think about this everyday and hurt more and more. I try not to think about it because everyone keeps saying that i should be glad I got to see your true colors. But you would never understand the pain and hurt i feel because you’re not the one going through the pain. All you say is sorry but you very well knew what you were doing. I try to rise above it and see you for who you really are, but it just hurts sooooo bad and i’m still in absolute shock. I guess you didn’t really love me after all because when i thought we were getting things back on track and fixing things, you went and had sex with your “friend” and she’s now the mother of your child. I don’t expect you to really care because you’re not in my position smh.

There’s nothing more for me to say right now because my hand are shaking too much as the tears are running down my cheeks