How do you make this seem so easy

How do you make this seem so easy

How do you make this seem so easy

LTME postMy Queen,
I know you will probably never get to read this letter and that is probably for the best, as this is more for me then it is for you. I knew from the beginning it was a bad idea starting to pursue someone I was already close friends with but you came in and swept me off my feet. You brought out feelings in me that I didn’t even think were possible for me to feel, you got me to open up and share things that I never could with anyone. You made me feel complete, you could turn around any bad day by a simple text, you brought a smile to my face every time I saw you. You made me want to become a better man everyday for you and I saw a serious future with you. Yet, I knew I was getting way more invested into you as you were into me, but I wanted to keep fighting and not give up because you brought a love out of me that I didn’t think I could feel for anyone else and you knew I felt like this and you brought me on the biggest rollercoaster of a ride. I saw ourselves drifting apart and I wish I was stronger back then to remove myself before I invested more feelings into you but you had a knack of taring me down yet coming back saying the right thing at the right time so I could never walk away. But now here we are, where you act like everything is ok, where we can go back to how things were before we went down this path. How can I be ok with being friends when I still love you so much? How can I put on a smile and suppress my feelings when you bring a new guy into the group? How do you make this so easy with everything we’ve been through? I use to not have a care in the world what other people thought of me, yet you somehow got behind my walls and destroyed everything from the inside out. I’m not ok with being just friends not yet at least, you are still the first and last thing I think about every single day. I don’t know why I still care so much and still love you so much after everything you have put me through, I don’t get why I keep having a sliver of hope that you will come around and remember all the great times and the passion we carried together. My love for you was real and still is, I will always love you, and you took advantage of that. I guess I don’t even truly know why I’m writing this, esspecially on a website, I’ve just never felt so incomplete. You have been a big part of my life and I’m scared I will never be able to truly be friends with you because I don’t think after being close with you once that I can go back to just friends, I’m always going to want more. I want nothing but happiness for you, I just want to be the one to provide that happiness for you. You have betrayed me, you have ripped my heart out and you made a mockery of my love for you. Yet here I am, watching you make this look so easy and I’m sitting here thinking I’m always going to love you.

Your Rock

1 Comment

  1. walls of not saying goodbye 4 years ago

    Im sorry jen come talk to me please you and me o it to eatch other for the sake of the family i always be there for you and your girls

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