I wish I would have let you know how you cured me for that while. Depression and anxiety went away for that time. Once you left, it all exploded. The only thing keeping me from going down that road was taken away. We had all the parts that add to a perfect relationship. I wanted you to be mine and you wanted me to be yours. Since you left there is another. A torturous emotionally corrupting situation. Not allowed to talk to anyone. Wear what I want. Go anywhere. that one fight we had, I ran to you and you were there. You said you would always be there and you always are. My life has been ruined forever now. Not because of him but because of what he did. Still with him but i am terrified that if we end up breaking up, I will end up without anyone. i am so angry. I am beyond pissed at you. You could have prevented this. You broke up with me for “college” reasons. Then when we met up that day you told me, “my friends always asked why i broke up with you.. And I have no idea.” God it hurts. being in an emotional abusive relationship and having this thing that will determine the rest of my life when you could have just kept me. Being off antidepressants has made me forget a lot about our relationship. I do not want that. I am pissed. Almost everyday I have thought once about you. I can’t stop. I am stuck. I wish you are happy because that is all that i want for you. You wrote to me on tumblr telling me you missed me and i had to tell you off for the sake of my current one. Now I have messaged you a few times but telling you not to answer, even though you probably will not see it. I wish you could help. Hes talking about apartments and marriage and I’m not sure. You know me though. I will see through this because I am scared. I am angry. so pissed at you. But still have love for you in my heart. A painful love.