Dear Kristen,

Hope you’ve been doing good lately with everything. It’s been awhile since we just chatted. I’ve been doing great, got a new job with a pay increase and still working per deim at VM. Going to fly out to Oklahoma for a week of training the new Orleans for another week. My debts getting paid off, and relationship with my family has been awesome. I can finally talk to them about almost anything. Been at the gym everyday I’m off work. Emotions have settled down, spilling has been for both of our goods in our personal lives. I still miss you at times when I have something exciting come up and wanna share, or smelling you as I go in for a hug, holding you in bed and thinking about how precious you are. I’ll always cherish those memories.

I’m sorry for blowing my top the last time we hung out, a lot was going on. I understand you were feeling hurt and it was a stupid situation. But we did need to focus on ourselves. There’s been a lot I’ve changed in my personal life, and I’m finally starting to be happy with myself and thinking about my future. I’m gonna be making good money and just thinking about what I can buy all these things and go on any trip, but honestly it’s all vanity. Nothing but vanity. I can’t apologize enough for the hurtful things I said at you, and for treating you as if you were just my friend. It got so complicated and I’m at fault for most of that.

I’ve been thinking about going back to dating, but honestly I can’t see myself with any these girls. I really don’t care about them. I hope you thought about what I asked you when we text the last time about considering seeing me again. I want to be there for you in the good and the bad times. It’s a lot to ask but I will make it worth it. If I lie one time, do something you strongly disagree with, or upset you by calling you anything derogatory or in anyway I’ll end it and go my separate way. If we are meant to be it’ll work out, if not then I’ll be okay with that and can move on. I wanna apologize with my actions towards you, not by words, you’ve heard it all before in the past. I wanna be your man Kristen. Hope you give me the opportunity to build your trust, treat you right, and be there for you no matter what.

I don’t want to waste my time or waste yours, I believe in us. And it starts with me, hope you find grace and forgiveness in your heart. In the end I would rather say,”Oh well, I tried one last time, we’re just not meant for each other.” Rather then,”What if I made it work.” You are my first love, you’ll always have my heart.

Love,
Paul