You got to know me on my darkest, i took medicine to keep my mind quiet. I took pills to make that dark temper go away. I took drugs to be in a grey fog, hide away my past, my fear. I was sick, my mind was on a war….and then i got to know you. You fall for me, for the image i was giving to you. The charming, good looking and funny guy, who was clever and know how to talk, the nice but not to nice guy. You fall for an image. One night i told you, dont love me, i am not the one who you think i am, i am not the one. You cried all night, why i was laying awake next to you, trying not to hate myself. In the next morning, you where still there, whispered, i love you… i never felt so good and bad on the same. I cut the medication, i wanted the grey fog to fade, ready to kill the worst of me to be the best for you….only for you. One night, after few days of hell, cold turkey from pharmacy, i woke up next to you, and i started to cry, tears of happiness, damn…i was never so happy in my life, nothing could take that moment from me…..later, much later i was waking up again in tears, the darkness, the deep woods where growing again in me, and i know i will lose you, but you where calming me down, you said you never have to wake up in fear again. how could you lie so bad to me? you got to know me on the darkest, made me a better human and then, when the light was fading, you are gone and laying now in another bed, while i cant sleep anymore, afraid, that no one will calm me down again, when the darkness is overgrowing me.