It’s been 6 years and 6 months since we broke up, it was a long “moving on” journey for me and I made it this far and I am beyond proud of myself but 2 days ago when my roommate took my phone and chatted you using my msngr acct telling you “I miss you” started to rekindle the feelings I buried. With that first message, we exchanged messages after.You told me I’ve changed alot since you saw me wearing short short during Sinulog but we both know you were the one who changed a lot and I was the one responsible for that.
You became the best f*ck boy in town and never in my wildest dream before I ever thought about you shrugging girls (of course you know what shrugging means).I miss the old you, you who respects me in all cost, the you who understands why we can’t text each other when I’m at home, the you who sings “because a girl like you is impossible to find, you’re impossible to find” when we were in high school, the you who asks my approval first if you can play dota after school, the you who begs when I talk about breaking up, the you who supports me with my dreams, the you who embraces all the flaws I have and accepts all my rules like no holding hands, no texting after school, no kissing and no touching. Our best friend joked us before I was the most boring girlfriend but you opossed and said you were so lucky to have me.
I started to believe that maybe you were the one for me, I know were too young at that time to consider it but you seem to be so sure about us that I on the other hand was confused and unsure what future beholds for us.
During our year and 10 mos, my father somehow discovered about us and we were both adjusting at that time because we attended different universities and when my father asked me to end it but I was so dumb that I just texted you at that day saying we need to end it but never give you any reason why. You were taking your midterm exam at that day and our best friend called me and she was fuming mad because you were crying because of that text message. You tried to call me not once but couple of times and I rejected all of them. You moved on after 2 weeks and your new girlfriend was our former classmate in high school that I was jealous of because she’s always flirting with you. I guess that would be your revenge? I was right.
You jumped from one relationship to another and it broke my heart because I made you a monster. I am so sorry for everything Jay, you’ve been so patient with me all those times and I only left you without any explanation and now that I am ready to fight for you, it took me 6 years to be this brave but your status in facebook right after we chatted shattered the hopes I have for us. You’re in a relationship with a girl who’s pretty and sexy and I am still just the plain and boring Kaye. You told me once, you still respect and love me and you can’t bed me not like those girls you had, it seems to be compliment thou an I thank you for that and since I’ll never ready to fix you so I am now fully letting you go.
Thank you for the wonderful memories I’ll forever bring Jay. We might not end up being together but I know for sure, I loved and will still love you but maybe in a different way now.