Somehow I’m glad that you have finally find your way out in our so called relationship although it’s painful and makes me felt empty and I’m sure I am not alone feeling this wayーI know, you are feeling it too.
From the day I have lost my trust in you and I actually firmly decided to break up, you convince me to continue it and give you a chance, And I did.
Because of that chance we end up hurting each other for quite a long time.
The fast events always haunt me everytime we have misunderstandings, Like, again and again.
(That could have been very tiring to hear)
I did some mistakes, many mistakes that have hurt you emotionally without even really noticing it.
Giving you advice that we should end up and you should find a girl that would suits you and actually knows your culture and will understand your daily going out routine.
Long Distance Relationship is unbearable!
No contact a day can actually makes my mind crazy thinking so many possible stuff that you’ll end up doing.
Things have been on and off.
Sometimes more than 3 days no contact and still we made it out and became okay again.
I know i’ve been hard on you and you have been through hell with your emotions.
I didn’t realize how my words and pushing you away could have actually hurt you.
They were right.
“YOU WOULDN’T REALIZE YOUR MISTAKES UNTIL YOU HAVE LOST THE PERSON”
“YOU DON’T VALUE THINGS UNTIL IT’S GONE”
HeartBreak is a bitch!
It hurts! But really, I’m quite glad because you finally realize everything too and you finally given up on our Roller-Coaster Relationship thing.
It’s a shame to realize it too late after all we been through, But I’m gladーーsomehow.
If we actually have our relationship out from being in a Long-Distance thing I wonder if we actually lasted longer than we have.
If we live closer like before we might have ended up fixing things in person to clarify things even how hard and tiring it will be.
I will always remember how were things when we are actually together.
Everything was okay even though theres a misunderstanding we can easily talk it out and fix it.
But we did handle our Long-Distance Relationship situation quite well I just messed it all up.
Trust issues and past events will never go away :/
And yes, what you have decided for us is okay even though, IT HURTS!
And that is pretty NORMAL like you always told me. Missing you and longing for you is HELLA NORMAL!
I will get used to it and so will you.
Thank you for being firm in your decisions because I couldn’t been firm with mine.
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Ash?