dear marcus

at this point i don’t know what else i can say in hopes of changing your mind, although i’m quite certain that i won’t. but what i want to say is that a part of me will always love you. thank you for everything that we had, the good and the bad, and for helping me to slowly but surely become a better version of myself. i wish we could forget the past and move on, and build something together. i know it in my heart that we can, but it will be very hard work, and i don’t know if that’s something you’d want to do. honestly, i don’t know why i want to either, but i believed and still believe so much in us, what we could be. in the past year i’ve always dreamt of waking up next to you every day because you’d become my home, someone that i could always go back to, no matter what. i understand now that this cannot be. i understand that no matter what we have been through, there is a limit to what we both can take. just as you have reached yours, i foresee that i will reach mine. i’m sorry for my transgressions. i’ve always believed that people can change, but maybe my belief was never enough–i couldn’t change soon enough. and i’ve to accept that. i wish we could start over, but i can’t say that i won’t make the same mistakes if i never had the chance to learn from them. now i have. i’m only so imperfect, and i’m sorry that it was too much for you to take. it’s a shame that we won’t get to build something based on what i have learnt to do better. and i’m so sorry for that. but thank you for loving me the way you knew how. thank you for being my strength, for helping me feel as though i could overcome anything as long as i had you around. now i think it’s time that i have to do the same without you. and the same goes for you. and i only wish you the best, because i believe that you deserve it. as i’ve said, a part of me will always love you. thank you.