I wish you knew how I really felt when you broke up with me even though I smiled and laughed the next day. I wish you knew how I feel about you now. I wish you knew that I still think of you and care for you. I wish you knew all the times my heart ached when I saw you with other girls. I wish you knew that I didn’t mean the words that I said to you on the night you broke up with me. I know I shouldn’t think that I’m the one to blame. Whenever I think of you I feel a roller coaster of emotions. I feel happy thinking of all the moments you smiled at me and made the butterflies in my stomach rise all the way to my heart. Then I would feel angry thinking about the girl on the side that you were talking to and told me she was just your BEST FRIEND. Then I feel sad and confused, thinking that everything is wrong with me and I didn’t deserve you. It’s already been over a year and I still have the items that you gave me. I still adore the card you gave me and wish you still felt the same about me now the way you did back then. I still have the beads of the bracelet that you gave me. People say that your first love is the person you will never get over but I wonder if you ever actually loved me. When I heard the “reason” that you asked me out makes my blood boil. You are just ashamed that you ever dated a person like me. I know I don’t have the best appearance but you didn’t have to act as though you dated me out of pity. You told the girl that was just your friend that “you only dated me because I liked YOU”. Lastly, do you know how much you’re teasing me? You show interest in me on social media and in real life. You think I don’t see you glancing at me or notice you like my pictures. Do you remember when we had a couple fight? That was one of the best moments we ever had. Whelp at least I will never have to tell you my real thoughts.I wish you knew that I still love you.