A year..
A year I waited amongst the darkness of my own soul that was wrapped up by suffocation. Four months I was bounded to the floor on my knees weeping because you had a journey you had to go on. I supported you in it. It was something you needed to do even though I knew I could lose you. The cards I was dealt were given to me with the lies you fabricated before you dealt them. Six months I bacame bitter and shut off as I watched you fake everything you had while you exhausted yourself with out knowing. The thing about being fake to “show” people who you think everyone wants you to be, the more you lose yourself in the chaos of your own lies.

Nine months I lightened myself by not allowing you to have power over me. You wanted me to wait but you didn’t want to say it. Your words not mine. But you knew I was going to already. Eleven months I knew my worth. As you wanted to have your cake and eat it too, my bitterness was gone and the wounds to my heart may have not healed… But these cracks you made amongst my heart I forgive you for. I now know you were just words like the echo threw the wind that was only meant to pass me. Never to return again.

A year….. A year I waited for you as I watched you in the arms of a man you tried so hard to fix. A man that fakes the same way as you do. Ask his ex that still gets messages from him. It is very much a small world.
That year taught me many things about myself. The happiness that comes after chaos of ones emotions. The light in a dark room when I thought I was alone. But that light wasn’t you. That flicker in the darkeness giving me hope wasn’t you!!! It was my heart…. One thing that I will never give you a chance to touch ever again. I will always Love you but you will never get that close to me again. You were the Darkness.

A year I stopped answering your calls and began making my own journey without you by my side.. I thank you and God for the pain you caused. It was the best lesson yet. I wish you well. I wish you the best. And by all means I hope you find your happiness. God knows I will.