Hey handsome man,

That’s what I used to call you. So it’s been three weeks since the last time I saw you. Yesterday we actually wanted to meet up but you said you had so much work to do, that I can’t come over, just like it happened so often. I sometimes think that this is just a dumb excuse so you don’t have to see me but sometimes I try to sympathise with you situation. Anyway I now am sure that I need to let go of you because I know I fucking deserve better than that. I need a man who wants to see me as often as possible and texts me and calls me just to hear my voice.

The problem is that I know you CAN be like that. When we first met you were all over me, you texted me on a daily basis, wanted to spent every single moment with me. And, oh, the things you said to me: how you could look at me for hours because I’m so beautiful, how I’m such an intelligent person, that my character is absolutely unique and he’s never met someone like me, that I’m something really special to him. And I always believed him, I could see it in his eyes that he meant all those things he said.

But after a while things started changing, I firstly felt it when you stopped replaying to my text messages or didn’t text me every day. I hoped that it was just because you got so much work to do cause this is what you told me! But it just went on and on with you detaching yourself from me and my life. You didn’t even seem to be sad to loose me so I did what I had to do and ended things between us. 

So now I’m just in a really sad and confusing place because I desperately hope that you’ll come back and things go back to normal between us but on the other hand I’m not so sure if I really actually want that because I already hurt too much because of you. 

Guess I just need to trust In god, he has the perfect plan for me!