I never really experienced a broken heart, but since now I can totally understand how it feels. My heart and brain are fighting against each other. My heart wants to be around you, to cuddle and kiss you, my brain says constantly that it’s not a good idea. You were my world, my best friend and I loved you with my whole heart, it’s something I’ve never felt so strong. You guided me through the hardest days and you were always on my side when I needed you the most. But on the other side you also left me alone, took me for granted and you put a big pressure on me. I felt like I couldn’t be myself around you anymore, I had to be this perfect girlfriend and mother and I lost my own voice. Why couldn’t you just love me the way I was? Was I that bad to you? I feel like I gave more than I could, I tried my best to always support and take care of you. But you never appreciated that. We are both imperfect, we both have our faults, but that wasn’t why I left. I left not because I hated you, or because I did not love you anymore, but because of how our relationship was at the time. 

At this point, I know it’s better for us to live apart. Even though I wish we could be together. Since the moment I picked you up from the airport, I just want to be with you. And it’s not that I say this because I want our family to be together, I say this when I look at our relationship. I don’t have any more things to say. We’ve to trust and see where God will lead us. If we’re meant together, we will come back to each other. Know that you were worth so much to me and still are. You, and our memories are irreplaceable to me. I will love you really with my whole heart, forever.