I found you in a laundromat. You were a lost bird who flew away from your past. Ran away from an engagement and wedding to find yourself in another place. 
I loved you more than anyone. Anything. You said so yourself in your Valentine’s Day card. But you didn’t honestly know what to do with me. Or a love like mine. You tried feeblishly to play the role. Then my Dad died and your fake facade was shattered.
A true friend doesn’t throw a hissy fit and storm off on the NIGHT of their partner’s Dad’s funeral! 
You always had an excuse for your aberrant behavior. Some ace up your sleeve to win any argument or slam the proverbial door in my face and stonewall me.
You had a convenient littany of people in your past to cite as the reasons for your ways. How convenient they all lived 3 thousand plus miles away and I should never meet them. How easy to judge my family when yours lives only in the skewed versions of them you could tell me as I am cornered and alone with you. You entitled, spoiled prick. You self absorbed shit. You disrespecting cunt. You horrible, horrible human.
How casually you say things to me like “I just don’t think you could ever be happy.” Of course after scrambling my brain and fucking me up. I have never been happier. I see now the fullness and fortune that my life is blessed with. The abundance of love from friends and family who know me. You controlling, manipulative slime.
Wreck your car again. Get covid again. For all I care. I only literally healed you from the brink of death with that virus. Showed you ways to heal. Cat’s claw. Etc. I literally edited your resume so you could get the job you wanted. Helped you move on from the dingy laundromat. And my repayment is to watch you turn into a snide asshole on the day of my Dad’s fucking funeral. 
Now the snow is coming again. And ours was a winter love. So the soft hearted nature of me has me weak kneed again thinking of us. How special it seemed. How unique we seemed to be.
But you chose to throw it all away. 
You literally told me your menstral cycle so that we could have a kid, 3 months into knowing me. Who even does that?
Of course I would have been happy to. But I could see through you. I could see the endgame. I could see the chess game you were playing. Make it awkward. Increase the expectation so we could all feel the SUCK of it all. 
That’s NOT love!
And when I wanted a damn phone call. In my last week of living in the same town as you. Simply to tell you I am moving away. You blocked me / ignored me for a week. Because … I had told you I loved you? 
Well I did you moron. And love to me means something it doesn’t to you. I feel sorry for you. Maybe you will never even know what love is.
So that is why I went to your house and told you. You will NEVER. EVER. See me again. And you must NEVER. EVER. Do what you did to me to anyone else. EVER. Again. You thought you could simply block me and delete me from memory. Well at least I had the last say. And how PATHETIC of you to even entertain the idea of a f’ing restraining order. How petty! How low! How crass.
Tell the judge you want a restraining order from a guy who is literally MOVING AWAY 100 miles from your town. You moron. You damn moron.
How easy it would have been to simply speak to me like a human being who you were once in love with. Instead masquerading your own version of events so as to discard me like some rando hitting you up for sex. FUCK YOUR ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT ME.
I am rising from the ashes of this tiny turbid chapter stronger and wiser than I have ever been. I am doing the HARD WORK of attending to my FAMILY’S needs. You can not even attend to your own.
Running away from everything as if some mountains can save you. I hope you find your own REAL HEALING however that may be decided.
Once again fuck the low. Stupid. Paranoid. Asinine. Revisionist way you see me. Fuck. You.