Dear Tariq,

I am sick of carrying this feeling.  I am so exhausted by years of trying to push the emotions back down into my heart. I’m just going to let it all out and hope for some release and healing.

After all these years I still keep thinking about you. I’m not sure what’s happening, but I’m assuming it means I’m still in love with you. I think it would have been really helpful if we had helped each other through our break up – like friends sharing an experience who can better understand what the other is going through. Or if we’d gone for decoupling therapy that would have been great. If you still feel the same way then would you be alright with attending such therapy with me? I know we’re both married to other people, but the therapy might be good for our marriages too if we try to heal and  gain a different perspective on what exactly happened with us, to us, by us. 

But if you’re at peace, and managed to make sense of it all, or don’t really think about it and hence joint therapy sessions don’t make sense for you then I understand. At least I was able to get this off my chest. It may contribute to my healing and clarifying process.