Dear Juan,

I thought you were my last love, we planned our life together and I couldn’t believe my luck! What a blessing to have somebody love me so much, endless sacrifices, sleepless nights and long flights just to see my face, every day hearing how beautiful, smart and kind I am and how much you love me. I couldn’t wait to be your wife, I was so proud and delighted you chose me. 
But after 3 years, you threw me away like a used napkin, said you need to grow and develop, suddenly between all your goals, there’s no space for me. What?! I was the one who pushed you to be better, I was the one that listened to you and cheered you up. I thought we would grow together. I thought you’d make space for me because my goals are your goals, and we were building a life together. 
I still can’t believe it, it hurts as hell, it’s so bad i think im going to fall into a million pieces. It comes and goes in waves, and when i lay in bed at night and it’s all dark everywhere, I cry and I cry until i fall asleep, I know I’ll do the same thing the next night. I pray to the Lord in the mornings, and i see the sun rising, and i wish i could say its getting better, but the same so far. 
How could you do it? I gave you my heart to care for it, and I was proud and happy to give it to you. I gave you all of me, all my deepest shames and insecurities, and you loved me and hugged me and made me feel safe. You said you’d be there 100%. Until you left me, all of a sudden, and now you want nothing to do with me. 

Alright then, what can I say, I can’t force you to stay. I’ll pick up the pieces, and try put them together, and try love the broken me as well as I can. 
But no one ever hurt me so bad.

I still can’t believe it. 

Anna