Trophy I’m not

Trophy I’m not

Trophy I’m not

So…when I met you I fell madly and deeply in love with you, nothing new there on my part. We lived, we danced we shared…but little did I realize at the time, was that every moment that was real for me meant little to you. I was the trophy on your arm and you were the man I looked up to. You walked, I followed and soon I began to be the shadow that followed you instead of the light that led you. You put me on your pedestal from day one, and whilst in the early days I thought we bounced off each other and on the outside we looked like the perfect couple, you were not there for me when the honeymoon period ended. I could never continue to be propped up on the pedestal you put me on, that was never me and that is something I will never become.

Soon, your little eyes began to wonder but in my heart I still felt our love was strong and I believed in you. You lied to me. Not for being a cheater but because you always told me you were black and white and you clearly were not. I tried to be everything that you wanted me to be and stupidly I forgot myself for a while. I wish I told you to stop leading me down the garden path, I wish you didn’t encourage me to make life-changing decisions that didn’t affect you at all only for me to face the consequences and to be shattered at a drop of a hat. I wish I trusted my gut feeling and I wish I never put my trust in someone who said they would only ever be straight down the line. I wish I told you that you were the one that was insecure but in order to protect yourself you hurt me instead. I wish Id told you I hate liars from day one.


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