Dear Nick,

I wish I would’ve handled our breakup better and I definitely wish I could take back some of the choices I made in the process of it. But the thing that eats away at me the most is that I never just grew a pair and told you how I felt when you came back. You were my first everything and I think of you everyday and when you left me the second time only after reconnecting for a few short days I felt like I had to get on with my life because I felt so unwanted by you. So I started dating the guy im dating now. And then months later you came back and tried telling me how you felt and instead of saying that I’ve never stopped loving you and that I never will, I let my fear and poor judgement get in the way and I lost your trust and you. I wish I would’ve told you that I never stop thinking about you, everyday you run through my mind. And now that youre dating again even after all you said, I feel so hurt, like before. And I know I shouldn’t because im the one who started dating first. But Nick I miss you. I miss the sleepovers, being inseparable, playing with zack and your younger sister, I miss the Cubs and bulls games I miss having you. No one has made me feel the way you did. I feel like I’ll never have that passion, that pure and genuine love ever again and it kills me because maybe if I had waited and held off on dating then you and I would be together now. That’s why I want to go to that school you know, well partly why, because you’re there. I miss you Nick. I really really do. And I wish I could tell you that. I wish you would reply to me. I miss you.