Hi Milachku,

I woke up from the “Clinical Depression” – I did it myself without medication or counselling – it was not easy; it took me 3 months.

I am confident and brand new. I took my time to think about you in clear mind and what went wrong in our relationship. I studied hours and hours what I should have done to make you happy.

Now i am happy about myself and I have no worries, i feel free. I know if I am not Happy about myself i cannot make you happy. Nobody likes a miserable person; even I did not like myself last few months. I am not a new person – I am the same person with more knowledge about relationship, your need. I have more knowledge about how to keep love alive and keep relationship happy and healthy.

Do I want you back, yes I do. I worked on myself and prepared myself with a “To Do List” to make you happy with me again:

1. Food – I started eating food from your country- and actually started to enjoy the taste -it is different than ours – but the variety of taste gives me another pleasure and sensation. I would like to have your food, my food and different kind of food with you. I will never complain that I do not like the taste of your food – because i understand and appreciate various taste of food in the world already. I do not want to carry my masala’s here and there to cook food for me any more! I feel shy about letting you do that. 🙁

I worked on my limitation and already improved my taste to give you easier life.

2. Clothing – I already bought a whole set of underwear (lingeries and bras) for you and will throw the old ones away, so that you feel new, comfortable and good about yourself. I already bought a new set of “Summer Dresses” for you and swimwear for this summer. I want you to feel new, and happy.

3. House and Living: If you want to live with you grand parents; that is perfect. I will accommodate and i will try my level best to make them happy about your being with me. If you want you can move in to my place, I will pay rent, food, everything.

4. Family Money : I now know how to make money in your country. I did not know that – because I worked different way in my country – it was difficult to accommodate in new way of life. But i learnt it and I do make money now and I want to bear all the cost of running family. If you are working I want you too keep you earnings for yourself and do whatever you want.

5. Language – I started learning your language – the book you bought for me. I will definitely start speaking your language with your family and friends. It is a shame I did not do it before.

6. Leisure – I started playing different kind of fun games with my friends and strangers in this city in the evening. It keeps my away from the daily worries and workloads and make my brain ready for tomorrows work. We will play different types of games in the evening, board games, cards, etc to have simple fun, keep our evenigs more memorable with small things. But i will cheat in the game sometime, as always and get caught (I love getting caught by you!!)

7. Health and Fitness – I started going to Gym, walk and run in the evening, swim sometime. We will make a schedule what kind of physical activities we will person each evening. Healthy body and mind is important for healthy relationship – i understand this now.

8. Personal Space – We will go out with our friends – you go out with your friends some time and i will go out with my friends some time to enjoy our personal time and space. Being with each other all the time creates tension; and we get bored with each other.

9. Movies – I have started watching romantic movies and surprisingly i started loving them. I already watched “The Princess Bride”, “When Harry met Sally”, “17 again”. I liked them. Romantic movies keep our brain calm. So, we wil go and watch your kind of movies and my kind of movies – 50/50.

10. Celebration – I remember your birthday – memorized it for rest of my life time – 30th June!! I forgot the date we first met and the date we first made love ( you know those dates!!). We will go out for dinner, dance or do some fun things at those days. I will always have some surprises for you, i promise. Alas, i was useless, i did not do it before.

11. Activities – I went to the local zoo twich this month and enjoyed those beautiful animals. I went to Asian Food Festival yesterday as well. I went to a village nearby the capital to look around and understand local culture and people. We would go for different kind of activities every weekend.

12. Party – I took 8 dance lesson this month – and I am almost ready to take you for a dance. Am i not improving?

14. Culture – I went to local opera few days ago. First time in my life time and frankly speaking, I enjoyed it. I beleive Opera in country is better than this country. I would take you to Opera and different cultural events to enjoy our life more.

15. Happiness – I will buy flower(s) every evening to make you feel happy. There will be surprises for you every week to make you feel important in my life.

16. Appreciation – I appreciate your personality, your requirement, what you like and what you don’t like as an individual and as my Loved One; i will give more priority to you.

17. Friends and Families – Your family is my family and your friends are my friends. I want to give them as importance as my family and treat them the way i treat my family. I will try to make them happy about my being with you and do things so that you can feel proud of me in front o f them.

18. Love – I want to keep it blank as it is going to be published in public.

19. Children and their future – You know you are the only woman I ever wanted to have children with and I am still sad that you first baby was not born naturally. It was one of the reasons for my “Clinical Depression”! I want to have children with you and give then good education, morals, values and principle. Teach them all the religions, so that they can decide if they want to practice any; if not that would be their choice.

20. Life – the first time I saw you walking down the stairs, i fell in love with you and i am still in love with you. I always wanted you to be with me rest of my life time and I left my country, my lifestyle, my business for you. I sounds story from the book, but it is the reality. To be with you became so important that I forgot to do the basics things. But now I understand, “It is not only love, love is like a tree, i need to keep it alive with duties, responsiblities and activities. Otherwise love will die soon, like the plan in the desert without water”. I know that and I am prepared and ready to take care about my love for you and your love for me. I do really want to keep beside me rest of my life time and grow old.

21. End – end of life, i want to die after you so that you do not feel the pain of loosing me, you can go to heaven happy (I do not believe in heaven or hell, it is metaphorical), I will keep the pain of loosing you.

I do pay very importance about our 4 years time together. I know there was love between us all the time and there is still love there – what I understand – is I need to do daily beautiful things to keep the love alive….in need to do that….it is my job and responsibility.

Did you spend four years of valuable life time behind me? Yes you spent your time, money, emotion, love, hate, resources, tears, smiles, happiness behind me; i did the same. I respect that – i take it as a precious gift. You put a lot of effort. You put yourself on the floor, you cried; I did the same.

Now I know what to do to keep you happy all the time and keep myself happy at the same time – I am matured and I am a Man. I know I will look after you better than any man will be able to do, i know you are important for me and you are important for yourself and I know what you want and I know what I want.

I respect your opinion, your decision; at the same time I am not weak, confused, vulnerable Robie any more, I am ready to make you “The Happiest Woman in the world”.

I am ready for you, my milacku!

🙂

Your Robishku!