Dear Ka,

It’s been 9 months since we parted ways.

I never imagine myself being here after 9 years of loving you. You are my life since the day that I met you, I can’t define it, or explain why, but you were my great love. I’m hoping that you would show up in front of our house telling me that you still love me and you want me back, but real life doesn’t work that way.

I told everybody that I moved on and I’m happy now, but it feels like I’m lying to myself, that a big part of my heart knows the truth. I was really hurt when you told me that you’ve found a new one.

Since we broke up, there has been a lot of things I can’t do. I can’t listen to music. (Yep, you are a great singer). I can’t watch The Vampire Diaries and The Walking Dead (Our favorite Series). Looking at your house is really killing me. I can’t eat Dinuguan anymore.

I can’t forget the feeling of your hands.
The smell of your cologne.
The taste of your kiss.
I miss mocking you every day.
I miss the feeling of hugging you.
I miss listening to your childish complaint.
I miss YOU every day.

I only wanted the best for you. I never loved someone as much, and nobody’s presence has ever made me happier than yours. You were the girl I wanted to spend my life with, travel with, build a family with.
The truth is I’m not happy, I can’t be happy without you in my life. I am trying to forget you, but every time I close my eyes, you are there, in my head.

If somebody asks me if I still love you, the only answer I have is…
Always.